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by katerbees



Category: Throne of Glass Series - Sarah J. Maas
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-10-26
Updated: 2017-10-26
Packaged: 2019-01-23 09:43:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 8,274
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12504540
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/katerbees/pseuds/katerbees
Summary: Elide begins her journey home to Perranth. Can she forgive Lorcan?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! I just love these two together. But, until we get book 7, I just don't see how they are going to reconcile, so I've created my own version. Takes place after the books.

Perranth. It was everything Elide remembered and more. Ancient oaks grew in vast swathes over the hilly terrain. The air here was fresh, clean, free. When the Lady of Perranth returned to reclaim her Title and Estate, it would be her first order of business to open up the Castle and tear down that damn tower. Vernon’s lackeys had fled when word of Erawan’s defeat and Vernon’s brutal death had spread throughout the kingdom. As such, the castle was in a state of disrepair and full of refuse from the bacchanalian revelry of the soldiers.   
Elide sighed, peering through the open doorway, her light frame heavy with the burdens she had been forced to carry in her short life.   
“I guess I just thought when the war was done we all could finally relax” she loosed a breath as she brought her arms up to remove the pack she had carried. It fell with a thud at her side. She turned up to look at her companion, a Fae male, who towered over her by a solid foot and a half. Lorcan gave Elide a wide berth, unsure of how the return to her childhood residence would affect her.

“Well, at least the castle is empty for now. Although, it probably won’t be for long. As word spreads that the Lady of Perranth has returned, your counsel and protection will be sought out.”   
Elide arched a brow, “My protection?”   
Lorcan remained serious, eyes scanning the courtyard, always prepared.   
“Elide: honorary member of the Ironteeth and Crochan legion. Companion to Queen Aelin and General Aedion. Who stood with them in the final Battle of Morath and banished Erawan. People will know; stories have already travelled. You do not give yourself enough credit Elide” Lorcan turned to face her.   
There was more to say. There was always so much more to say between them. But they held back all the words and feelings. Holding back enough to keep it from being real. Because when things were real you could actually could get hurt. Lorcan knew some of that pain. He didn’t think he could even feel pain or terror until a few months ago. When he saw Elide kneeled before Maeve, a dagger to her throat. Lorcan physically shook his head to rid himself of those terrible images which still haunted his dreams.  
Elide gave a small smile, “I suppose you’re right. I am pretty tough.” She then surprised Lorcan as she reached her had up to touch Lorcan’s inky black hair.   
They had been on the road for weeks. He suddenly became very self-conscious. Of everything. Of the dirt covering his body, of the fact that they had finally reached her childhood home, which seemed more like a tomb than a place for a young woman, and of the fact that he wasn’t sure what there was between them; if there was anything between them.  
After Lorcan’s betrayal of Aelin and her friends, Elide traveled with the witches while Lorcan traveled with his cadre. They had found and rescued Aelin. She had died and came back; her mate sacrificing his immortality for her. Then, the battles began. Wave after wave. They were too busy to talk. There were no romantic confessions as they all walked to their potential deaths. There had only been action. When the dust had finally settled, and they all stared at each other in bewilderment, there was still no time to talk. There was no heart to heart. There was planning to do. Territories to manage. Valg to hunt down.  
When things finally calmed down, Elide said she was going home. He’d offered to accompany her and she surprisingly hadn’t refused. She also hadn’t been particularly verbose on the trip home. But he could tell by her scent that much of it was due to the fact that she was absolutely exhausted. There was no longer seething anger coming off of her. Just bone weariness and in the back of her mind, worry. Worry about what she would do now that she wasn’t going to be on the run, or hunted, or caged.

And now they were here. And now what.

He was brought back into the present moment, not even realizing he had been staring off in the distance at that damn tower while Elide was saying something to him.  
“Lorcan?” she repeated.  
“Yes?” he finally answered.  
“Thank you.” Was all she said. Her hand returning to her side. He wasn’t quite sure if that’s all she had stated before. He had truly been so lost in his own mind that he hadn’t heard anything she had said.  
__________________  
Elide noticed Lorcan’s midnight eyes glaze over and his body begin to shut down as she reached up and touched his hair. She didn’t know why. Was he disgusted by her touch? It had been so long since they had shared that moment in the hammocks before the whole world had gone to total shit. At least before that happened she knew who she was, who her friends were, and had hope. All of that had fled on that blood-soaked beach.  
Lorcan had betrayed all of them for her. He had called upon a woman who had promised to kill him, for her. The logical part of her knew that he had risked it all without thinking. He had seen all of Ansel’s ships and panicked. In an instant he had used his powers to shout “Help!” and Maeve had done what she did best: twist something into its basest and most cruel intention. Yes, Lorcan had meant well, but the consequences were so so terrible, did that even matter?  
That day she felt actual physical heartache. Elide was so mad that he betrayed their friends. Not once, but twice, when Lorcan revealed that Aelin had two wyrdkeys. She knew that with the blood oath he had to tell Maeve, but Elide also knew that she would have sooner died than betray her friends.   
However, if she was honest with herself, she also found herself angry for a much more petty reason. How could he ever love a person like Maeve. She had truly felt like she knew who Lorcan was in their shot time traveling together. She had been ready to offer herself up to him completely. Her heart, her body, her loyalty, and her home. And on that day, she saw what a person whom Lorcan actually “loved” was like and she felt like she didn’t know anything.   
When it was all said and done though, she didn’t want to travel back to Perranth alone. And she felt like even though she wasn’t sure if she could or would forgive Lorcan, he could start his penance by escorting her back to her home. Even though it hadn’t been a home since before her parents were killed. Indeed it had actually served as a prison to her longer than it had ever been a home. Yet in those marshes, the night she and Lorcan had shared a few passionate moments, she had let herself dream that the two of them could make it one. And now, looking at the castle, the tower, and Lorcan, she just felt like it was all an unbearable load of shit.   
\-----------------------  
“Of course. It was an honor.” Lorcan replied. It was Elide’s turn to return to the present from where her mind had wandered.   
She fidgeted with her hands.   
Lorcan, even though he was over 500 years old, couldn’t predict what her next step would be. Tell him to go to hell? Employ him to keep the castle safe until things calmed own? Forgive him? No—he stopped himself short on that one. He wasn’t foolish enough to hope for that. What he had done was unforgivable. But he was willing to spend the rest of his miserable, lonely life making it up to Elide, if she would allow it.  
Elide stopped fidgeting with her hands, and grabbed Lorcan’s hands, holding them in between her own.   
“I have been thinking this whole time we have been traveling here about what to say to you. I have been imagining what it would be like to return here. And now that we are here, and you are in front of me, i don’t know what to do about either.” The words came flying out of her mouth. She wished she had more eloquent thoughts and words. She didn’t feel like much of a lady at all. She started again.  
“I honestly don’t know if I can forgive you. I know you did what you thought was right at the time, but you really hurt me and my friends. There are people whose lives will never be the same because of what you did. And I’m sorry that I don’t know how I feel about any of this but I don’t. “ Elide looked up at him, forcing herself to look him in the eyes. Dark eyes meeting even darker ones.  
Lorcan stood there, taking it all in.   
“You don’t owe me anything Elide. What I did was unforgivable and I’m not going to ask anything of you other than the opportunity to serve you. The borders here are not secure yet, and there are still Valg wandering around. Let me be of use to you is all that I ask” Lorcan was straining with every word that came out. Of course he wanted her to forgive him. He wanted to take her into his arms and make her feel safe. But he knew that was not going to happen. He didn’t deserve for that to happen.   
Elide gave his hands a squeeze, dropped them, and turned to go in to the castle that had been the scene of the best and some of the worst times of her life. She took a deep breath and called behind her “You can start by bringing my bag inside.”  
Lorcan almost smiled.


	2. Chapter 2

Lorcan was a warrior who was used to a regimented lifestyle. A soldier. As such he wanted to create a stringent schedule for himself. He awoke with the sun every morning to engage in his combat exercises. He would then go hunt for game and return to clean and cook it. They didn’t even need the food. He kept his mind busy to keep it from wandering and to keep the path in front of him steady. It had worked for him for 500 years. It had worked for so long before he had met Elide. And even though he was around her again, he decided, for now, old Lorcan was who she would need: a finely tuned killing machine. One that ready to lay down his life for hers and protect her at any cost. In his heart and mind, he considered himself blood-sworn to her for the rest of her life.  
Elide had set up her meager belongings in a large apartment that had previously been used for important guests of Perranth. She had no desire yet to go to her parent’s old bedroom, nor to the one of her childhood. It felt like she would be walking on someone’s grave. She had walked through enough graveyards in Morath.   
She was a lady. She didn’t feel like one. Or look like one. Or smell like one. She smiled at that last one. At least that one could be fixed by a bath. She collected some wood from the kitchen; while Vernon’s soldiers didn’t bathe often, they certainly stuffed their lazy faces on a regular basis, judging by the larder and the amount of firewood they had stockpiled. She grabbed a bundle of logs and took them to her room. She then set forth to grab buckets of water for her bath.

Lorcan was swinging his hatchet around, practicing defensive movements today. His shirt was off, his hair pulled back away from his face to maximize his peripheral vision. He detected movement to his left. The Fae warrior stopped swinging his hatchet and saw Elide limping with a handful of heavy logs, walking through the courtyard from the kitchens to the apartments. He thought to ask her if she needed help, but stopped himself before speaking. She had made it clear to him what his role was around here. However, a few minutes later when he saw her struggling with two jugs of water, he moved to help her. Faster than a human, Lorcan swooped in and removed them from Elide’s small hands.  
“Hey! I had those!” Elide shouted at him  
“Yes, and now I do. These are quite heavy. Where do you want them?” Lorcan remained calm, easily placing the two jugs on his shoulder. Purposefully putting them out of Elide’s reach.  
Elide’s mouth tightened and she actually made to jump for them, her arms up over her head, aimed at Lorcan’s shoulders. She collided with Lorcan’s rock hard body and at that exact instant realized that he was shirtless. And glistening with sweat. She looked up at him, flustered, a small amount of heat across her cheeks.   
“You’re supposed to be guarding the castle, not playing nursemaid,” Elide hissed, backing up a few inches.  
“The closest people are a solid 5 kilometers away and, while headed this direction, are not in a hurry, and sound quite relaxed. Therefore, I am prepared to take on a few extra duties, such as water jug delivery for the Lady of the house” Lorcan responded, his black eyes almost smiling. Gods he had missed talking to her so much.   
Elide sighed and clicked her tongue. “May I remind you, Lorcan” she said his name harshly “that while I was in Morath, I was responsible for hauling buckets of water up and down countless flights of stairs, multiple times a day, while my legs were chained together.” It all came out harsh, and mean, and worse than she expected and she almost felt bad because at first she had meant it to tease back, but once all of those words came out, she realized that none of it was funny. It was all just sad. And maybe it was horrible, but she thought Lorcan could deal with a bit more pain for the shit he had put her through. The ball was back in his court.  
Lorcan stood there; this was not how he expected this conversation to go, he just wanted to help Elide carry some water and save her the trouble. Indeed he would never forget that Elide had been put through hell at Morath. He had beaten Vernon to death with that chain Elide had been forced to wear. Slowly, and mercilessly.   
He had also wondered, “what if?” What if he had set on his mission sooner? Would he have reached Morath when Elide was there? Would he have been able to stop her from being sent to the dungeon at least? Would he have even noticed her? He had been so arrogant.   
Lorcan sighed. And told Elide the truth. “I just wanted to help you. Just because. Not because I didn’t think you could do it. Please let me.“ If she pushed more, he would push too. But for now, he hoped she would just accept his help. Elide sighed, nodded her head ,and turned on her heel and allowed the warrior to carry the water to her bathing room. Lorcan braced her ankle the entire way. She did not complain.

Lorcan gave himself a quick wash. Those voices he had heard earlier were getting closer. Four males, two females. Definitely smelled human. They were speaking in normal jovial tones, not trying to hide their presence. He went back to Elide’s apartment and knocked on the door. “Elide” he called out. “There will be people here within the hour. They do not immediately pose a threat of being Valg, witch, or fae, however we will need to be ready for them.” He was yelling through the door. No response.   
He rapped his fingers twice against the door again and gently opened it a few inches. Her scent hit him like a physical blow. It had been so long since either of them had the luxury of enjoying a real bath, he had lost her scent. And now, cinnamon and elderberry were cascading all around him. He lost the ability to speak or think to breathe.   
Stop it. Stop it. Stop it. I can’t. He had to get away.   
Lorcan turned away from the door, slouched against the wall , and slowly sat down against it. His long legs splayed out in front of him. Go to her. I can’t. Make this stop. I can’t. Dueling voices in his mind. He was certain he would never hear that voice again. He was sure Hellas would have disappeared after the final battle. The gods were supposed to be gone.  
Lorcan’s hands were trembling; he was not used to arguing with a god.  
Elide couldn’t remember the last time she had taken a nice warm bath. She had taken a very short one when she and Lorcan worked at the carnival. But she had been so concerned about her where her clothes would be, how to tell Lorcan about her uncle, and people finding out her secrets, that she wasn’t close to being relaxed. No. This bath was different. She had eased into a full tub of water. A true luxury. She then began the task of scrubbing months’ worth of road dirt off of her body and hair. As she did this, she took some time to think.   
At first all she could think about was getting Lorcan’s sweat off of her neck and arms from they had collided. She had touched his sweaty chest. She lingered on that thought for a few seconds, remembering their time together in the fortune teller’s tent; his well-muscled body sitting across from her asking her all sorts of prodding questions about her bedroom life. A heat wave filled her body. She then remembered the words she had said to him a few moments ago. He had genuinely wanted to help her and she bit his head off.  
Elide hated being mad. She hated the person it made her into. Even those years she hated Vernon , she was still able to hold out hope. Hope for a better world. Considering all that she had been though she wasn’t even that sure why she was so mad at Lorcan. But she was. Ughhh it was all just so confusing. She decided it was because she had actually trusted and cared for Lorcan. Vernon was just evil in her mind. She didn’t ever expect better. She expected things from Lorcan. That night in the marshes seemed to belong to a different time and two different people. He did it for you.  
Elide looked around her room. She recognized that voice instantly. She hadn’t heard it in months. Her goddess who watched over her should be gone. Gone home with the other gods. That’s what was supposed to happen when they banished Erawan. It was for you. The voice again. Elide shook her wet hair, combing her fingers through the tangles. She was not one to ignore the goddess usually, but today, she was not up to this discussion. Lorcan had mentioned people were arriving. People who expected to see a Lady. Not some confused little girl.   
Elide stood up from her tub and wrapped herself up in a warm towel she had left sitting in front of the fireplace. That’s when she noticed her door was open.   
Elide picked up the poker sitting next to the fireplace and slowly, stealthily, headed for the door. Once she reached it, she quickly popped it open.   
And there was Lorcan. Sitting next to her door. His back up against the bricks. Looking down. Looking defeated.  
“What are you doing out here?” Elide asked, surprising herself with the gentleness in her voice. She placed the poker up against the door.  
Lorcan looked up at her. And it was then she saw that he had been crying.   
Lorcan felt like an idiot. Here he was, a 500 year old Fae warrior crying outside a 20 year old woman’s bedroom like some love sick fool. But he couldn’t stop the tears. And Hellas was not helping. Hellas who had guided him through his entire life, who had been there for every kill Lorcan had ever made, who Lorcan had thought he would never hear from again, had just spoken to him and told him to go to Elide. Why did this all hurt so much?  
Lorcan looked up at Elide, her tiny frame covered by a towel, her scent filling the entire hallway. His body was flooded with warmth.   
“Lorcan?” Elide asked again. She now crouched to his level so that her face was mere inches from his. “What’s wrong?”  
Where would he even start? How could he even start? Even when he and Elide had been on the best of terms, he wasn’t one to sit down and discuss his feelings. But here he was with his damn eyes leaking so there was really no way to get out of it. “It doesn’t matter,” was his only reply. He attempted to gracefully wipe the tears from his eyes.   
“Lorcan. Even though I’m mad at you, I still care about you. If you want to talk to me about it, I’m here for you” Elide said in a genuinely kind voice. With that sweet mouth that Lorcan loved so much. He found himself staring at it and he wanted so badly to reach over, gently grab her face, and kiss her. But he knew better. Any contact would have to be initiated by Elide. He would always respect her even though every fiber in his being and even a god was screaming at him to embrace her. To breather her in and never let go.  
Elide gave Lorcan’s left forearm a squeeze and returned to standing position. And then that sweet girl put her hand out, as if she would actually be able to help Lorcan get up. That gesture was enough to make Lorcan almost smile. He took Elide by the hand and allowed himself to be helped up by the diminutive woman.   
Elide looked up at him, trying to judge how much would be too much to push, “so did you originally come here to cry on my doorstep or did you have some news for me?”  
Lorcan snorted, “It just so happened that I am a man of many talents, and after my afternoon session of releasing my eye strain, I had planned to alert you that your first visitors, Lady Elide, should be here within the hour. I shall make sure the throne room is ready so you may receive them if you desire.” Lorcan puffed out his chest, proud of his quick recovery.  
Elide only half rolled her eyes. She put her hand up to her forehead and saluted Lorcan “Very well my esteemed captain of the guard, you are dismissed.”   
Lorcan stood there for a few more seconds, staring at Elide.   
Elide raised her eyebrows at him as though to say what?  
“Thank you” Lorcan said. It occurred to Elide that it may have been the first time those words had ever come out of his mouth.


	3. Chapter 3

Lorcan sheathed his hatchet and put a short blade in his boot, and strapped a longsword to his back. He wasn’t going to take any chances with either Elide’s safety or the stability of his newfound home. Even if he didn’t know how long Elide would allow him to stay here. He strode over to the gate house to escort whoever might be arriving. He tried not to dwell on what had just happened. How the hell was he supposed to keep watch over Elide when he couldn’t even be a room away from her without keeling over like a seasick idiot? Lorcan’s features hardened. What was the point of any of it? If they weren’t even going to be…he couldn’t quite put a word on it…friends? More than friends? Why was her damn scent so intoxicating to him? He had been a proud male Fae. He had bedded scores of women in his 500 plus years on this world, and yet Elide had the power to turn him into a useless pup. He suddenly regretted calling Rowan a dog as he himself felt quite tethered by an invisible leash.  
Elide was lucky to have found the wardrobe in the apartment well furnished with dresses of various sizes. She smiled. From what little she could remember, she knew that her parents and their staff tried to always be prepared to host any event at any time. As such, their steward placed several extra outfits in extra sizes in each of the apartment’s wardrobes. Elide found dress that was a rich shade of green, pulled her hair away from her face so that it was in a half-up position on the top of her head, and assessed herself in the mirror.   
She still didn’t feel like a lady. None of this felt real yet. But the bath had helped. She looked like a presentable young woman. Elide knew that she would need to project confidence, wisdom, and grace. She drew her shoulders back, straightened up, and hoped that Lorcan would remember to brace her ankle. When things calmed down, Aelin had suggested calling for a healer from Eyllwe to have a look at it.  
Oh Lorcan, Elide thought. She was concerned about him. She had seen him cry on the beach that day that Aelyn had been taken away. Weeping as he realized he had sent his best friend’s wife to be tortured. But nothing out of sorts had even happened today. She wished things could instantly go back to how they had been when the two of them were traveling together. She had gotten to see parts of the world like she had wanted to. And, even with the Ilken hunting her, she had felt safe for a short period of time. Elide shook her head. This was not the time for daydreams, it was time to go be a Lady. Time to represent the House of Perranth.  
A small party of five people approached in the distance. With his Fae vision, Lorcan quickly identified two men in the cart, one younger and one older. They were both solidly built but not a threat. The type of men who were in good shape from hard work rather than through a particular training regimen.  
“This was a stupid idea Roland” the taller and younger of the men said. “If the Royal court wanted help they bloody well would have sent for it.”   
“We don’t know that. For all we know there could be a court of one hundred or a court of ten. We should be proud that Perranth is free and see if there is any way of serving our new Lady.” The barrel chested man who Lorcan now assumed was named Roland, replied.   
“I hear that it’s just Lady Elide and her lover! And they rode back here together all the way on one horse!” A woman’s voice cut through the air.  
Lorcan snorted . They didn’t even have the luxury of a horse. And wait, what? Elide and her LOVER?  
“That is no way to talk about a Lady! And it’s no way for you to be talking at all! .” An older female voice reprimanded the younger one.   
Dear gods Lorcan thought I forgot about things like court gossip and politics And he certainly did not miss them. That being said, he was rather enjoying this bit of eavesdropping he was privy to through his preternatural senses.  
“Elide isn’t like that” A male voice that Lorcan hadn’t heard yet had joined in. It caught his attention immediately. It belonged to another young man. A young man who was riding longside the wagon on his own horse. This man appeared to be in his mid-twenties, with grey eyes, and black hair. He had a wiry appearance. But his voice has sounded so confident.  
“Oh yeah? And how do you know that Nox? You know this young Lady is pure as the driven snow? “ the young blonde man in the cart retorted.  
“I just know Sean, and if you speak about her again that way you may find yourself in need of new companions. You were invited along on this foray for security on the roads. As we are approaching the castle, we will no longer have need of you,” Nox answered.  
Lorcan did not know why, but he let out a low growl. Who was this man and how did he know anything about Elide? Memo to self, possibly maim Nox for knowing Elide. Other memo, possibly maim Sean for mocking Elide. The cart was close enough now that a human would be able to easily discern everyone who was in it. As the cart approached, Lorcan walked towards the group.  
Nox dismounted his horse and displayed his arms and hands in an open manner. Lorcan towered over Nox by a foot. Nox did not seem intimidated, even though Lorcan’s dark power at this point was involuntarily radiating off his body. The animals had stopped rustling, the horse bristled with fear.  
“We are loyal patriots of Perranth who have come to see if we may serve Lady Elide. “ Nox stated, not one ounce of him intimidated by Lorcan.  
Lorcan stood there, he was not good at niceties. He should have planned what he was going to say to these people instead of listening to their gossip and making idle threats to them in his own mind.   
“I am Lady Elide’s Captain of the guard” he purposefully left out that he was also the only member of the guard “ it is up to my Lady to judge if and how you would be able to help Perranth. First I will need to know who is calling so that I may tell her” As Lorcan spoke he could feel the eyes of all the wagon passengers upon him. Especially the eyes of the women. A usual source of pride for him, it just made Lorcan feel strange today.  
To his surprise, it was Roland, the older man, who responded first. “I’m Roland Aratta. I was a stablemaster here before Lord Vernon had all of the employees fired. This guy,” his thumb jutted towards the man sitting to his left, “is Sean Rivelo. He is a scrapper. We weren’t sure if any more of them demons would be roaming around, so we picked him up in the city before we came this way.”  
Sean looked nervously at Lorcan and gave a small wave.   
“Why hello there.” The young female purred towards Lorcan, “You can call me Petra, or lady Petra. My mother worked in the Castle before the purge and I would like to continue the family legacy. I also am quite good at horseback riding” she gave the tiniest wink at Lorcan. Were he not over five hundred years old, he might have blushed. The older woman sitting in the cart with her did blush mildly, clearly more concerned about Petra’s demeanor than Petra had been.   
“And I’m Kerith. My husband died last year, heart attack thank gods, not to any of them demons, my kids are all gone and spread across the world. I’m just looking for a place that needs me. No one else does anymore.”   
Nox was the next one to speak, “May we speak to the steward?”  
Lorcan gave a tense smile. “I am the Steward.”  
Nox cocked his head slightly. “I thought you were the Captain of the guard?”  
Lorcan was beginning to get irritated by these people. Especially this one.  
“I am both.” Lorcan said. “You may follow me into the courtyard.  
\--------------------------  
Elide wrung her hands. It was a terrible habit. She had been pacing in the throne room for half an hour. She had tried listening at the door, but she didn’t hear anything and it had made her feel like a child sneaking around somewhere she wasn’t supposed to be.   
“Welcome. Please, call me Elide.” She practiced. She wanted to be a Lady of the people. For the people. She wanted Perranth to be a home for everyone that desired one.   
“Hello. My name is Elide. I’m sure you’ve heard of me, but I don’t believe I know you…” she tried again ugh dumb dumb dumb Of course you haven’t heard of them, you were in a tower for ten years, Morath for almost a year, and then in a gods damned war for another year. She had no idea what to say. When she had been little she had been trying to get out of the throne room as quickly as possible so she could go play.  
She heard the door click and Lorcan entered. A hateful look upon his face Well at least he is feeling back to normal she thought.  
“They all appear to be telling the truth. There are five of them. Three males, two younger, one older, and two females. One older, and one around your age.” Lorcan reported briskly.   
:”And?” Elide asked.  
“And what?” Lorcan responded.  
“Lorcan. Did you find out anything about them? Where they came from? Have they been affected by the war firsthand? Do they need a place to stay? Have they seen any demons on their journey here? What are their names? Did they have horses?” Elide nervously spat out about twenty questions.  
Lorcan looked at her. Really looked at her. He could tell by her crimson palms she had been wringing her hands. A nervous habit.  
“Elide?” Lorcan said, forcing her to quit rattling off more questions what were they wearing? Did they have any food? Were there any animals in the courtyard? Questions designed to both kill time and questions that showed she was really damn anxious. “Elide” Lorcan repeated himself, gently grabbing her chin and making her look up at him.  
“You’re going to do great.” Lorcan’s wrathful features softened as he looked down at her. “These people are really excited to meet you. And they want to help Perranth. That’s what really matters.”  
“I’ve never done anything like this.” Elide replied softly. “My parents were killed before I cared about court life or court niceties.” She sounded like she was on the verge of tears. This strong woman had conquered so much, and yet this was what made her nervous. But then Lorcan realized that it wasn’t just nerves. Being a Lady was more to Elide than just a title. It was a connection to her parents. She missed her parents and wanted them to be proud of her.   
Lorcan couldn’t resist himself. He pulled Elide into his muscular body, wrapping his arms around her petite body. She didn’t object.   
“Your parents are proud of you. You have made them proud, and you will continue to do so. And,” Lorcan whispered while trailing his fingers through her black hair, “I’m proud of you too.” He bent his neck, and placed a kiss on the crown of her head. Such gentle retraint.  
Elide stood there, enveloped in Lorcan’s arms. Gods his arms around her just felt so right. His trembling fingers running through her hair and that gentle kiss. Elide wrapped her arms around his athletic body and allowed herself to just enjoy this moment, whatever it was, for a few more seconds.   
Lorcan was correct in part about why she had been so concerned about meeting her ‘subjects,’ she cringed at the word. She wanted to make her parents proud. She wanted people who remembered her parent’s to think well of her and what she represented. However, there was so much more to Elide’s concerns: she didn’t want there to be any more people like Lorcan. Not in a mean way. She didn’t want there to be any more orphans or people who felt they were so unloveable that they became monsters. Now that she her title had been restored, she had the power to make that happen. It might not happen today, or tomorrow, but she had vowed on their trip home that she would see it through. For now, she let Lorcan hold her in their new home.


	4. Chapter 4

Lorcan couldn’t remember the last time he felt so content. He had rarely felt true happiness in his long, blood-filled life. When he had, it had been due to things like destroying cities, playing drinking games with Rowan, and killing Valg. Those seemed so shallow and almost a mockery of the gentle peace that was currently filling his body with warmth. Elide was letting her hold him. And, she had put her arms around him; her small hands now absentmindedly stroking his lower back. Lorcan almost gasped at the body contact. He continued to run his fingers through her long black hair with his left hand, His right hand moving to stroke her face.  
“Lorcan?” Elide said so quietly, were it not for his Fae senses, he would not have heard her.  
“Hmm?” Lorcan returned. Afraid to say the wrong thing. Afraid to ruin this perfect moment.  
“I missed this” she said, squeezing Lorcan tightly, pulling his muscular body even closer to her small frame.  
Cinnamon and elderberries filled his nostrils, and suddenly he became extremely cognizant of Elide’s full bust pressing into his torso. He had always tried to be a gentleman, but Gods did Elide have gorgeous, full breasts. Lorcan’s breathe caught in his throat. He had given up on ever touching her again, and here she was, pressing her body into his like her life depended on it.  
Elide didn’t know quite how to feel. Everything in her body was screaming at her to touch Lorcan, to let him hold her, to kiss him, to do…other things to him. Things she had never done before. She had still not totally forgiven him, but she knew, deep down , that he would earn her forgiveness one day. Elide lifted her head up from where it had been nestling against Lorcan’s firm chest. She looked up, surprised to find Lorcan’s face softened from its normal stonewall appearance. Elide studied his expression. He was waiting for her to make the next move. He knew that she needed to feel comfortable before anything else would happen.  
Elide reached her hand up to Lorcan’s face, stood up on her tiptoes, and kissed him. That was all it took. Lorcan’s lips instantly recognized hers, and met them with equal pressure. Elide parted her mouth slightly, allowing her tongue to graze Lorcan’s lips. It begged for permission to enter. He granted it.  
Lorcan felt like his body was on fire. He moved his hand down to Elide’s rib cage. Slowly running his fingers up and down her torso, silently asking a question. Elide answered by taking sis hand and placing it on her chest. Lorcan groaned as Elide allowed his hand to softly cup her right breast. Its weight felt perfect in his hand.  
Elide had no idea what she was doing, but Lorcan sure did. They took turns kissing and exploring one another’s mouths as Lorcan’s hand gently massaged her breast. Elide wanted more. She needed more. She slowly pulled back from Lorcan’s mouth, looking up at him, his eyelids heavy, his features almost gentle.  
“Lorcan, I’d like to….”  
She began, and was interrupted by a knock on the door.


	5. Chapter 5

Lorcan was going to kill someone. He was going to rip off their hands and shove them up their own asses. It took every ounce of restraint in his body not to knock the door down and scream at whoever was on the other side. Instead, he just stood there.   
“I told them to wait in the courtyard.” Lorcan gritted the words out. Making an effort to not show Elide exactly how pissed off he was.   
Elide herself was rather flustered as well. That was the farthest she had ever gone with any one. And this was the second time she and Lorcan had been interrupted. Elide pulled away from him. She took a moment to smooth her hair, smooth her dress and calm her breathing.   
“It’s ok Lorcan,” Elide said, giving him a quick smile, her hand on his chest.   
He let out a low growl, turning away from Elide and away from the door to rearrange his pants. Rutting kiss ass humans.   
Elide took another minute to prepare herself. She drew upon Asterith’s friendly smile, Aelin’s confidence, and Lysandra’s charming personality as she shouted towards the door.  
“You may enter!”  
Lorcan just snarled. He could not help it. He was a Fae male who had just been in a heightened state of arousal. It did not just turn off like that.  
The five travelers entered the throne room. Nox was leading the pack.  
“Hello. Sorry we didn’t stay in the courtyard. We thought it was a little suspicious that the steward was also the captain of the guard and that there was no one else around. We were worried maybe something happened to Lady Elide.”  
Lorcan was instantly in Nox’s face.  
“Did you have that ridiculous thought because I’m a Fae or because you’re a total idiot!?” he bellowed.  
“Lorcan!” Elide shouted, while half running over towards where Nox and Lorcan stood toe to toe. “My apologies, my captain of the guard takes his job a little too seriously.” Elide said, gently nudging Lorcan back while giving him a powerful look that told him to step aside. He snarled and turned his back.   
Nox stood there, a slight blush in his cheeks. It was obvious he was working on swallowing whatever retort he had prepared for Lorcan.  
“Now, where were we? Hello to you all,” Elide stepped back so she could see all of the travelers. “I am Lady Elide, this is the only member of my Court, Lorcan. As you can see, he is very overworked, so please, let me know personally what I can do for you.” Elide gave a welcoming smile.  
“I’m Nox. I knew your friend, our Queen, Aelin when she was Celaena. She saved my life. I would like to repay that debt by serving you, Lady Elide, in whatever capacity you would have me,” Nox knelt down.  
Lorcan rolled his eyes, tried to keep his glowering minimal and continued to pace on the opposite side of the throne room. That idiot. What could he have to offer Elide that Lorcan couldn’t? And he had insinuated that Lorcan had harmed Elide. Idiot. Ripples of his dark power were rolling through the throne room. He did not care.   
While Nox was still on his knees, Roland began speaking. “M’lady. It is truly an honor. I worked here for your parents when you were a wee thing. I tended stables, but I know how to make myself useful in many areas.” The older man showed a mixed sense of pride and gratitude and Elide immediately liked him.  
“I’m Sean,” the other young man said. “I’m trained in a bit of fighting, and I know my way around a kitchen. It would be an honor to help restore the Castle of Perranth to what it once was.”   
Elide smiled softly. She hadn’t pegged Sean as the sentimental type.   
Elide suddenly became aware of a woman with auburn hair who was staring at Lorcan. Suddenly, she did not feel as welcoming.  
“Who are you?” Elide asked. Petra did not here her. Instead Kerith spoke next, Elide barely listening as she had tuned in to the way the oher woman was undressing Lorcan with her eyes. Elide sensed Kerith was done talking.  
“I said. ‘who are you?’” Elide repeated, barely recognizing her own voice. It sounded like a mixture of her own and Manon’s. Petra suddenly snapped to attention. “Lady Petra ma’am. Not a real lady such as yourself of course, but a lady in waiting. My mother worked here and I would also like to,” Petra replied evenly, she had certainly lost her swagger.   
At some point in time Nox had returned to his feet.  
“Very well. There is room for all of you here. For tonight, feel free to rest up and help yourselves to food and baths. In the morning we will discuss what needs to be done and who will be doing it. Since there is no one else here yet and Lorcan is sooo busy guarding today,” she paused to give him a pointed look, but his focus remained purposefully elsewhere, “I will take you all to the area of the castle where you will be staying.” Elide began walking towards the door. “Oh, and another thing,” she turned to face all of them, a genuine smile on her face, “Welcome home.”`


	6. Chapter 6

Lorcan had lost his cool. And he was sure Elide was pissed at him for it. But he wanted to explain to her that he was not a human. He was a Fae male. The territorial Fae bastard thing was real. The fact that he hadn’t murdered any of those men spoke to how much Lorcan was trying to restrain himself. He let out a long sigh after the others had left. No use sulking about, he thought, and headed out to check the perimeter.  
Elide sat in her bed, taking her hair out and running a brush through it. What the hell had been going on with her earlier? She felt like she wanted to rip Petra’s throat out. Elide had never felt so angry so quickly before in her life. It scared her. All Petra had been doing was looking at Lorcan. Well, ogling him.But still. Back at the carnival people paid money to watch Lorcan exercise, and a farmer’s wife had even paid for his sweaty shirt. She hadn’t felt even remotely homicidal that night, just annoyed. Ugghhhh. This was confusing.  
Lorcan was there again. He hated nights like this. Maeve was there, a dagger at Elide’s throat. Blood on the sand. Rowan screaming for his mate in the distance. Elide’s arm was off. Crunched off. She was on her knees Blood pouring out of her arm. Maeve was laughing at him. He could not move. The blood oath kept him there. Elide. No I’ll do anything Lorcan shouted and shouted. Flames seared his face. Aelin’s power was so strong. Even in her iron coffin. Anything? Mave asked. Yes Lorcn replied. Let Elide go . Maeve was on top of him. He was inside her. No. He didn’t want this. He hated her. Why was this happening. He wanted Elide not Maeve. Maeve rode him, her legs gripping his torso and she straddled him I thought you loved me, you wanted this Maeve laughed as she bent down towards him, her face inches away from his no no no no.   
Lorcan woke up doused in sweat, breathing heavy. Oh Gods. Oh gods. He shuddered. He knew it was a nightmare, but it felt so real and it was so terrible and he could still see so much of it in his mind. He hunched over in his bed, willing himself to be calm. Think of darkness, focus on the dark. Don’t look over there, don’t think about that, just the dark. He heard quiet footsteps outside his door. Then he heard the doorknob turn.  
Elide had woken up to Anneith telling her to go take a walk. The goddess of clever things normally gave Elide good advice, so she put on a shirt and walked down the corridor when she heard shouting coming from Lorcan’s room.  
She entered his room quietly in case he had fallen back to sleep, but she was shocked by what she saw. Lorcan was on his bed, shaking like a leaf. Elide rushed over. “Lorcan,” what’s going on? Are you ok?” She sat next to him in the bed, taking his hands in hers.  
Lorcan slowly looked up, his onyx eyes meeting Elide’s concerned stare.   
“I have nightmares.” He started. “About the beach. About things I’ve done. About Maeve. About you.” It was all just above a whisper. And it was breaking Elide’s heart. Elide slowly moved herself closer to Lorcan, and positioned herself so she was sitting in his lap. She placed her arms around him, arched her head up, and whispered in his ear, “I’m here now. I’m real. We’re home”   
Lorcan felt his entire body buzzing. Elide was sitting in his lap, in his bed, and calling this place their home. Lorcan gave a small smile.  
“I’m sorry about earlier today.” He said softly. “It’s hard for Fae males to stop going when we are attracted to somebody. That doesn’t make it right, but I did try to not be a total ass.”  
“I know, “Elide said, moving a hand to his bare chest.  
“And then when he implied that he thought I had hurt you I just wanted to shut him up because I would never ever hurt you.” Lorcan was trembling now, his hands in Elide’s lap, gently stroking her upper thigh.  
“I know.” Elide repeated. She pulled her head away and gave a slight grin, “you missed it, I went all territorial Fae bastard on Petra”   
Lorcan laughed. Actually laughed. “Maybe territorial witch is a thing?” he mused. “I guess that means you must like me a little bit.”   
Elide smiled, “I think it must mean that.” She moved her body so that she was now straddling Lorcan, and gently yet firmly pushed him down onto the bed. “Let me show you how much I like you”


End file.
